INDIE CHILL: KINGS ELLIOT’S “I’M GETTING TIRED OF ME” IS BRAVERY DEFINED

11/20/20

Here’s something I’ve never admitted on the Internet before: I suffer from panic disorder. It’s been that way for over a decade now – and, honestly? It feels cathartic to finally write those words. Going back 10, five, maybe even two years ago, I probably wouldn’t have felt comfortable revealing this piece of information. But it’s thanks to artists like Kings Elliot opening up and sharing their stories that I’m at last able to share my own.

It’s rare, however, that an artist opens up quite as much as Kings Elliot. While shooting the video for her debut single – the beautifully sprawling indie chill ballad “I’m Getting Tired of Me” – the British act found herself in the grip of a panic attack. If you’ve ever dealt with this affliction, then you’ll know how debilitating this experience would have been. As your heart races and your throat tightens, all rationality is thrown out of the window, replaced instead by the thought that the end is finally, dreadfully here.

But rather than run from her panic attack, this time, Kings Elliot decided to face it head-on. And beyond that – she bravely decided to film it for everyone to see. In doing so, Kings hopes to assure fellow panic sufferers that they’re not alone in their plight. More importantly still, she hopes the video serves as a visual reminder that no matter how bad a panic attack feels, it always, invariably passes.

If you’re currently suffering from panic disorder, I’ve linked to some resources containing further help and information below. Sometimes all we need to calm the rough, choppy waters of our minds, however, is a song. With its gorgeous, melancholy-swept vocals and devastating narrative about personal demons, “I’m Getting Tired of Me” could very well be that song. And after the anxiety-inducing year that we’ve had, who wouldn’t be grateful for young, valiant voices like Kings Elliot?

For more from Kings Elliot, head over to Instagram and Twitter. Meanwhile, for support with panic disorder, visit Anxiety and Depression Association of America.

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Jess Grant is a frustrated writer hailing from London, England. When she isn't tasked with disentangling her thoughts from her brain and putting them on paper, Jess can generally be found listening to The Beatles, or cooking vegetarian food.