BEST NEW MUSIC: PNB ROCK - ABCD (FRIEND ZONE)

It’s 2018, we’re somewhere still in the midst of the #metoo and anti-incel movement, yet somehow we’re still getting songs about “The Friend Zone???” I’ll tell PnB Rock the same thing my friend told me the last time I thought I was getting “Friend Zoned”-- IT DONT EXIST, SHE’S JUST THE WRONG ONE FOR YOU BRO. DON’T FORCE IT, GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE AND YOU'LL FIND YOUR REAL TRUE LOVE, I PROMISE.

That being said, singing a song about the Friend Zone is pretty relatable to approximately 90% of the world's population. If you are currently feeling sore about a friend zone situation, I feel you. Maybe, just keep it close to the vest, y’know? Let me guess, you got the feels, kicking around in your bedroom. Acting out with what's the point of it all levels of frustration. You’re deeply in love with someone who thinks you're cool enough to hang out with but not get down with. I GET IT. And so does PnB Rock. This song perfectly encapsulates the emotions that more of us than would care to admit in a public forum like this one have felt time and time again.

This is the kind of song you can play on repeat to help get over a thing that's never ever ever going to happen. Seriously, just give up. But take care of yourself. Give yourself some TLC. One night to cry, and then time to get over he or she or it or they or yourself. But in that night of self-pity you might as well listen to some tunes that might make you feel better about yourself. Why not start with “ABCD (Friend Zone)” from PnB Rock. It will help you heal!!

PNB ROCK - ABCD (FRIEND ZONE)

I didn’t know that mumble rap had spread so universally that it had begun to cross over and take cues from RnB. PnB might be the first purveyor of the Mumble R&B game, which is so fitting I can hardly believe I am the first person in all of history to use this term. I’m sure at some point PnB was like “the hooks of all these mumble rap tracks are the best part. What if I made an entire sound based on them?”

AND BOOM HERE WE ARE NOW. With a jam. PnB, the master of RnB. PnB, the master of jams. PnB and Jam Sandwich.

Rakim Hasheem Allen of Phily is about to be a man in high demand. Not only can he sing and even rap too, but he’s got so much hook talent it's like he’s the killer from I Know What You Did Last Summer. I guarantee we’re gonna hear a whole hell of a lot more of this voice on the radio, in soundcloud rap songs, subheadlining music festival lineups-- you name it. He’ll be like the new I Love Makonnen, but without the burn out and fade away.

Considering Mumble rap needs need mumble hooks-- PnB about to be in major business.

From deep within the murky depths of the Los Angeles River emerged a creature: 50% raver, 50% comedian, 10% Robotcop. Kurt Kroeber doesn’t own a dog, operates Soundbleed (the world’s only dance party comedy talk show rave), and is down to party with you. Come up some time and say “Hey dude!” But definitely make sure to casually drop the secret Illuminati password.